Video: Children of God

Mrs. Beaver:

I have been radically changed by adoption over the past decade. This video captures my Father's great mercy in my life perfectly.

(Don't forget to mute our music on the left side below the photos.)

Learning to Seek; Seeking to Learn

Mrs. Beaver:

"Seek the Lord and His strength;
 Seek His face continually." (Psalm 105:4)

Lord God Almighty, Abba-Father,

I do not know how to seek Your face continually, but I desperately want to know. I thank You that Your Son promised that the Holy Spirit will teach us all things (John 14:26). Please grant that the Spirit will teach me how to seek Your face continually.

Thank you, Lord, for Your goodness.
Thank you for Your holiness.
Thank you for Your purity.
Thank you that You never betray.
Thank you that You have been so long suffering with me.
Thank You that You are so slow to anger.

I long to be holy as You are holy.
I long to shed an extravagant, magnanimous, rich, deep love on others, just as you have shed such a love on me through Your Son's sacrificial, sin-atoning death on the cross.
I long to be kind, tender-hearted and forgiving (Ephesians 4:32), just as, in Christ, You have been with me.

I love You, Lord. Help me to love others as You have loved me.

A Tired Plea for Prayer

Mrs. Beaver:

A friend at church recently told me that she likes when we put specific prayer requests on the blog because she then knows how to cry out on our behalf. I was touched by her willingness to pray for us. We are grateful, really, really grateful, for the support of people who are willing to spend time and energy praying for our unusual family.

It's me who could use extra prayer cover this week. Mr. Beaver is traveling for a full week. At this stage in a new adoption we normally tried to avoid such a prolonged absence by dad, but there was just no choice this time.

My concern isn't really the behavior of the children. My concern is my own ability to meet whatever misbehaviors do arise in a Christ-like manner. I long to be patient, gentle, humble and forgiving. I want to be winsome when I need to correct a child or children. However, knowing I won't have the wonderful respite I usually get at the end of the day when Mr. Beaver comes home from work, I'm already finding that walking "in a manner worthy of the gospel" (Ephesians 4:1,2) is that much harder. And it's only Monday!

Please pray that I will be like Jesus as I interact with my 12 children this week (especially in light of the Tessa's wedding being next week!). Please pray for my endurance. Please pray that I will rise in time to feast on God's word rather than snacking before I start interacting with the kiddos. Please pray that I will keep remembering what a sinner I am as I encounter sin in our home.

Thank you, friends!

A Letter to My Daddy

When Princess Bink was four years old, her daddy traveled in March
and we got 2-1/2 feet of snow while he was gone. They called it
a quarter-century blizzard for this area.

(Mr. Beaver is away on business for the week. Princess Bink asked if she could share some of her thoughts and frustrations with him through our blog.--Mrs. Beaver)

Dear Daddy,

I love you and miss you. I love you because you tell me about the Bible. I love you because you are kind. I love you because you are sweet. I love you because you and Mom don't fight.

I'm having trouble with being angry and with disobeying Mom. And I'm having trouble being patient with my little sister. I have been angry with her. Would you please pray for me, Daddy?

Love,
Princess Bink

Courtship: Blessed by Titus 2 Women

Tessa following her bridal shower
holding the beautiful roses she was given.
Tessa's wedding colors are: red, black and cream.

Mrs. Beaver:

Today we had concrete evidence that Tessa's wedding is drawing near. Some of the women from our wonderful church family threw a bridal shower for Tessa this morning.

I didn't take any photos during the event. I was too busy enjoying the delicious food (your cinnamon rolls ROCK, Mr Eveleth!) and ooohhhing and ahhhhhhhhing over the beautiful, useful and generous gifts Tessa received from the women who have been so special in her life. Tessa is now well equipped to turn her new apartment into a home.

Our thanks to our dear, dear friends for making the day so special for our soon-to-be bride. She has learned so much watching you glorify God through your marriages. You've taught Tessa that she doesn't have to fear or resent submitting to her man. You've taught her that she can find profound fulfillment in being a content wife, in raising her own children full time at home. You've modeled making your man your best friend. Thank you, friends for your love for my girl, your investment in her during the past eight years and for your generosity today.

Just as an aside we've had some pretty funny conversations with our two older newbies, Daria and Alexander, over a group of women heading off to party called a shower. We finally helped Daria to understand that Tessa would be showered with gifts, but I'm not sure the synapses were firing on that concept for poor old Alexander. He just couldn't get past his concrete understanding of the English word shower meaning a private event where you get wet and clean.

Make a Difference: Six More Things You Can Do

Mrs. Beaver:


Mr. Beaver with Jaynie (left) and Cassandra in September 2001 on the eve before
we began our journey to their new home in America.



Our friends who have just returned from their court trip in Ethiopia, emailed these words while in Africa, "Adoption is hard." They're right. What we know, having adopted four times, is that over time as the family melds into one unit, adoption just gets better and better--downright joy-filled. This doesn't change the fact that it is HARD at the beginning. Isn't sacrificial love hard by definition?

Those who aren't in the midst of an adoption can do so much to ease the burden and contribute to the long-term success of the adoption. Here are some more ideas to help adoptive families. (See Make a Difference, Part 1)

1) If you have been invited by an adoptive family to be at the airport when they arrive home with their new child or children, GO! For an adoptive family this is the climax to an emotionally draining and spiritually trying roller-coaster ride. The emotional impact of being greeted by a crowd of supporters is akin to the sense of support a newly married couple experiences when the people they love attend their wedding and reception. Landing at the airport marks the end of the adoption and the beginning of life as an adoptive family. Take your camera and a box of tissues!
 

2) When the new child joins the family through adoption, send a card just like you would for the birth of a baby. For some reason, our culture treats giving birth to a child and adopting a child or children differently. Adoptive families yearn for others to rejoice with them as they rejoice. God has done an unbelievably big work in their midst! Let them know you're celebrating with them by sending a congratulations card!

3) Just like families who've given birth to a new child, adoptive families will be blessed  if you'll bring a meal or even multiple meals to them. Whether a family is adding one child or a trio, their routine will be interrupted for quite some time as they adjust to the change. In addition, the family will probably be experiencing profound tiredness, both from jet lag and also the outlay of energy it takes to cope with the big change to the family. A church family could provide meals for a month, and it wouldn't be too much. When we adopted Tatiana, Natasha and Princess Bink, some friends from our church loved us sacrificially by bringing a meal to us every Monday night for weeks until we told them we were back on our feet again. None of us will ever forget this act of kindness!

4) As a new adoptive family settles back into home, offer to run errands for them. It is often difficult to leave the house at first. We were blessed during our most recent adoption when a dear friend offered to pick up some groceries for us. What relief it was to get milk and fresh produce in the house again!

5) As a new adoptive family settles in, pray for them. Pray, PRAY, P.R.A.Y for them and then pray some more. In more ways than you can imagine, they will be stretched. The children they were already parenting are likely to struggle with the change no matter how much they supported their parents' decision to adopt. The new child or children have a new culture to adapt to and a new family to adapt to. The adoptee will be without friends initially. They may well be learning a new language. Everyone in the family will be more tired than usual. Pray for them.

6) Even if you see the adoptive family at church or in town looking like they have it all together, continue to pray. What you see on the surface may not represent the struggles going on at home. Don't be afraid to ask how you can best pray that week, the needs are likely to be ever-changing. Honestly, their need for prayer will continue for years. What a difference you can make by being part of a team of people dedicated to crying out to God on their behalf long-term.

Well, my second list of five more suggestions morphed into six. Honestly, I could just keep going and going, but I hope these ideas stir up creativity on your part to participate in orphan care through supporting adoptive families. Your active love has more power to bolster and encourage than you might ever suspect.

Courtship: The Month for Matrimony

Mrs. Beaver:

The calendar proclaims that March has come. The month of Tessa's wedding has arrived.

I cannot deny that it will be hard to have my oldest daughter move so far away. I will miss her deeply.

However, my joy on her behalf exceeds my personal sorrow. Since Tessa's dad was involved in helping her discern whether she'd met her "'til-death-do-we-part man," I'm confident she will be walking down the aisle to her dream come true, a man who will look out for her best.

I know that Aaron is ready to protect her. I know that Aaron is ready to provide for her.

I know that Aaron and Tessa are ready to enter into the most beautiful of institutions: marriage. I know that they are ready to share joys...and sorrows as one flesh.

They are ready to go Dancing in The Minefields.

They are going to experience the ups and downs of being a family, but they will face these joys and struggles together.

And through it all my daughter will have a man on whom she can lean...a man she can look up to...a man who's lead she can trust and follow. 

In less than three weeks, Tessa's father will transfer our daughter's hand into that of a young man who I am confident will cherish and nurture her. I am confident that Aaron will love her--not in his own strength--but in the strength of the Lord. I am confident that Aaron will love her sacrificially. After all, he has been loved sacrificially by his Saviour.

Tessa was first attracted to Aaron because he loves, serves and depends upon the same magnificent God she does. They share a determination to glorify God in their union by aligning their relationship and their parenting to the wisdom found in God's Word.

I will miss my Tessa. She is truly a light in our home, and she is one of the best friends I've ever had. And I'm not naive. I know my daughter's path will often be hard. However, I'm full of joy as we begin March because soon, Tessa's path will also be Aaron's path. Together they will be more than they each could have ever been on their own. To God be the glory.

You Can Make a Difference, Part 1

Mr & Mrs. Beaver:

Getting in some steamy summer fun in the late evening on the day, July 16, 2001, on which we meet
 Jaynie, Cassandra, and Speedy. The building to the right is where the 300 kids ate their meals.
The buiding behind was home to classrooms and dormitories.

Since we adopted our first trio of older Russian children, Jaynie (8), Cassandra (7) and Speedy (5-1/2) nearly a decade ago, a growing number of Christian families have joined the movement to rescue the fatherless. With this change, there are also more and more opportunities for all of us to come alongside adoptive families to help met some of their needs and in doing those small tasks, make all the difference.

Having now adopted three trios of older children we can say from experience that those of us who adopt need the support of a loving community that is willing to come alongside us to help. We've all heard those stories on the news of adoptions, especially of older children gone wrong--sometimes terribly wrong. It doesn't have to be that way. It just may be that some small act on your part may be the difference between an adoptive family thriving or withering.

Here are five suggestions for things you can do. You certainly don't have to do them all. Any of these gestures will be experienced by the adoptive family as the fervent love 1 Peter 1:18 describes.

1) If you hear of a family that is considering adopting, ask God to grant them wisdom. Pray that they will be protected from the fear that so often paralyzes couples who entertain thoughts of adding another child through adoption. Pray that the Lord will increase their faith. Pray that He will help them to trust His plan for their lives.

2) If you know a family in the midst of an adoption, pray for them. Ask them regularly how you can best pray specifically at that point. As their adoption proceeds, their prayer needs will be continually shifting. Consider even organizing a prayer team that will stay active on their behalf long term.

3) Think before you make remarks about adoption to adoptive families. Those comments can prove to be hurtful or stir up fear. When we were in the process of adopting, Jaynie, Cassandra and Speedy, one of my friends who had been watching too many scary episodes of the Oprah Show, leaned close to me and whispered, "Are you going to put the knives away?" Ouch!

And no adoptive family needs to hear about the story of so-and-so whose adoptive child is a terror and whose family has lost hope. Adoptive families need your faith--not fuel for their fear. Adoption almost always turns out beautifully! God's power and grace are enough. Reminders of His willingness to give grace, encouragements about His ability to save and rescue are what adoptive families need to hear.

4) If a family is adopting internationally and they are nearing the date for their travel, they will most likely be required to take humanitarian aid with them. Ask what you can contribute. The adoption has probably already cost them thousands of dollars. Your help with the aid will probably be a financial help to them, as well as an emotional encouragement.

5) If a family is adopting and has a blog, follow their blog. They will be encouraged that someone is "listening" as they share their hearts about their new child or children. They will be grateful that you are taking time to follow what's so dear to them. They'll appreciate you putting in the effort to learn about the circumstances of the fatherless children in the country where their "baby" lives and, probably, suffers. You can rejoice when they rejoice and weep when they weep. You can post a "comment," providing a real sense of community for the adoptive family. It's easy to feel very alone when you're adopting.

Repeatedly, God's word commands His people to see to the care of orphans. If your circumstances don't allow you to adopt right now, you can still do so much that will contribute to the long-term success of an adoption. The orphan will be blessed. The adoptive family will be blessed. and, my guess is, that you'll probably be blessed as well. Treat these ideas as nothing more than a spring board to your unique ways to help adoptive families.

If you have ideas, post them in our comments section for others to see.

A Couple of "Firsts"

Mrs. Beaver:

One of the great joys of adopting older children is getting to introduce them to things they've never experienced. We've had a couple of those "firsts" in the past 24 hours.

Oksana slept in foam curlers for the first time last night, thanks to help from her sister Cassandra. Oksana was not alone in wearing rollers to bed. Princess Bink joined her in curlers last night and curls today.

A "first" that involved all three of our new children, Daria, Alexander and Oksana,
was making a trip to an American libraray, a place their new siblings love.

Daria, Alexander and Oksana were delighted to explore the library

and then borrow books.

Each "first" is it's own little milestone as we travel the path to adjustment

following the adoption of our three precious newbies.

We had one more "first" in our house today, although it didn't involve our family.

The members of the Nordstrom family who stayed in the States got their

"first" Skype tonight call from their family members who are in Addis Abba, Ethiopia,

to meet the little girl they are eager to add to their family.

I count it among our "firsts" because the three Nordstroms were at our house for dinner.

We're eager for the Nordstroms to be able to watch their little girl

"Peaches" experience "firsts" here in America!

"Firsts" are so much fun!