Josh and Zhenya: A Visit to Relish

The great joy of our Memorial Day weekend was a visit from Josh, Zhenya's fiance. His four days here gave me a number of opportunities to photograph the two of them.

Thursday night the whole family made the trip to the Omaha airport to pick him up.

The next afternoon, Josh and Zhenya went to the Recorder's Office to file for their marriage license.

When they were finished, they were happy.

The architecture of the buildings that surround the courthouse is some of the most beautiful in town. We took advantage of the scenery and a lovely afternoon to take a few engagement pictures.

Poor Zhenya, though. She was in pain. Just before the trip downtown, she'd visited our orthodontist. She went to get her retainers tightened, and left with braces back on her lower teeth to turn one of her front teeth which was twisting out of position. With each smile for these photos, she was scraping the inside of her lower lip over all that metal.

When Zhenya saw this picture that I caught of her grimace, she said, "You can post that. I love that Josh and I feel so comfortable around each other that we can be real with one another." I'm thrilled to watch a love that will need to endure many hardships and trials during their years together grow between them.

Zhenya was a trooper, though, and went right back to smiling.

Then yesterday, we returned to Omaha for Josh's return home. We had enough time before his flight for the family to enjoy an outdoor lunch at the Spaghetti Work restaurant in the beautiful Old Market in the downtown area. While we waited for our food I took advantage of an unusual sight in Nebraska -- a bright red British phone booth.

We started with a bit of fun suggested by Josh.

They then practiced a dance move with phone booth as a backdrop. Before they know it they will be "dancing through the minefields" together for life. God is so good!

And all too soon, it was time to head to the airport for Josh's departure. 

Eric and Lissie's Courtship: The Art of Studying

Mrs. Beaver:

 

 

It might surprise you that the first photo I'm posting since Eric arrived to visit soon after we announced Eric and Lissie's courtship is this one. But to this mom, the picture speaks volumes. 

 

After Lissie's dad gave Eric his permission to court Lissie with the intent to see if the Lord would have the two of them marry, Eric wrote to us. As part of the grateful email, he mentioned his desire to "study" Lissie. The words delighted me. The sentiment has the sweet fragrance of romance about it. What mother wouldn't love to have her daughter blessed in that thoughtful way? But, the concept Eric touched on also carries the weight of wisdom.

 

Eric and Lissie face the biggest decision of their lives. And they must navigate these waters of choice carefully because both of them are utterly committed to the concept of "until death do we part." God said, "And the two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate" (Mark 10:8,9 NASB). Divorce will never be an option for either of them, no matter who they marry. And if they end up marrying one another, they're so young that they need to be prepared to go "dancing in the mine fields" for 60, maybe even 70 years. Whew!

 

On top of all that, this is a decision that will have a multi-generational impact. Thus, Eric and Lissie must both be about the business of studying each other. They must study each other now--before they stand at an altar and say, "I do." They have a great deal of intentional interacting to do, whether in person or over Skype while 6,300 miles apart.

 

The idea of Eric studying Lissie made this mama's heart happy for an additional reason. A really good, multi-decade union worthy of the title "marriage" is made up of a lifetime of spouse-studying by both the husband and wife. When the other person's likes, dislikes, fears, dreams, hopes, and even idiosyncrasies are watched and mentally recorded, the husband or wife has the information necessary to delight in, support and encourage the God-given uniquenesses and strengths of their best friend. Both spouses also have what they need to be their life-partner's greatest prayer warrior at those places of personal weakness which we all have. Each can call down God's grace in a way that allows the other to grow and change and be more than they ever would have been alone.

 

So, Eric's determination to study our second-oldest daughter is wise beyond his years. What was he watching so thoughtfully in the photo above? You've got the picture now--Eric was carefully observing Lissie as she played a Bach concerto on her violin with her long-time duet partner and sister, Anna. By laying aside whatever he was doing at the time and coming to the door of our music room, Eric got an important glimpse into who Lissie is and what's important to her. I am certain that God will bless his willingness to be selfless as he puts forth this ongoing effort to be studious as he courts our daughter.

Dinner for Three

Mrs. Beaver:

Last night Mr. Beaver and I took 16-year-old Daria to the nicest restaurant in town. It was just the three of us. Doing anything in a group that small is unusual in a family our size! Daria even got to shop for and don a brand new dress for the special occasion.

Why all the fuss?

Daria is the sixth of our teens to go through an important rite of passage in our family. We call it the Purity Promise Dinner. Our goal last night was to encourage Daria to commit to physical, emotional and spiritual purity in pursuit of Christ-like holiness while she waits to marry the right man at the right time according to God's plan for her life. We asked her to commit to sexual abstinence until marriage because we want God's very best for her and for her husband-to-be.

Mr. Beaver and I draw these convictions from the Bible. So after ordering our food last night, Mr. Beaver went over a number of scriptures with Daria showing her God's good plan for her life. He took her to Bible verses where the Lord articulates His insistence that His people save physical intimacy for the marriage bed. Daria's dad showed her that God wants more than mere physical purity. He wants purity of the mind and heart as well. The Lord wants young people to save all of themselves for their marriage partners.

Once Daria's dad had explained our plea for her to pursue purity, he asked her if she was willing to wait. Her response was an enthusiastic, "Yes!" She went on to tell us that while living in the orphanage in Russia and attending a community school, she'd had the opportunity to witness the devastation that not waiting can cause. She'd seen the brokenness that giving your heart and your body too soon can produce. She told us she wants something more like the love-filled magic she's seen between her sister, Anna, and her brother-in-law, Aaron.

We warned Daria that the promise she was making would be hard to keep. She'd be battling the world's ways and her own hormones. Daria's not naive, however. Living in an orphanage until she was nearly 16 opened her eyes to the very realities from which we've tried to shelter our other children. She knows life's hard edge, but now she also knows Christ. She wants to fight the good fight with His help. We promised we'd stand shoulder to shoulder with her, always ready to listen to her struggles. We promised we'd always be willing to pray with her. We promised we'd be available to counsel her and guide her. We promised her never-ending support and love.

Once Daria made her pledge to wait for the right man at the right time, as her dad likes to put it, he pulled out the visible reminder of her promise to walk the path of purity. He placed a ring on her left hand which will remain there until a man who has Mr. Beaver's approval replaces the band with an engagement ring.

Daria's hand and that of her daddy

Until Daria's forever man comes along, her dad will protect her and provide for her. He'll train her in the ways of God, and he'll intercede on her behalf in prayer before the Creator and Sustainer of the universe. Then someday he'll stand at a wedding alter and pass those responsiblities to a young man who is prepared to be responsible for Daria for life.

 To God be the glory!

Tessa's Wedding: Extra Hands

Mrs. Beaver:

In yesterday's post I wrote about our desire to encourage, through hospitality, a sense of community among people who'd traveled from such distances for Aaron and Tessa's wedding. Sharing meals certainly contributed to a sense of fellowship, but so did working together. We were so blessed to have an army of helpers willing to take on any task to lift some of the burden off our family.

We had assistance in the kitchen. Here the groom, Aaron, and his younger sister, Amber, are constructing breakfast casseroles we'll share with out-of-towners the morning after the wedding.

Therese (in the pink), one of our photographers, helped also.

A whole crew then traveled to the reception site to help us set up.

Daria and Elizabeth

The people who ran the facility were so easy to work with and so accommodating.
All we had to do was decorate after they got the tables set up and covered.

They even loaned us some extra-tall vases which we filled with bling and wrapped each in a ribbon.

Once the vases were assembled, it was time to place them on the tables.

We were delighted when Aaron's family arrived.

When you're the bride, it's wonderful to have so many sisters who are eager to help.

At each place setting we put a bookmark, drawn by Jaynie.

When Mr. Beaver and I saw that everything was progressing well, we prepared to leave.

First, though, I asked Tessa if she and I could dance together to the song called, "Dancing in the Mine Fields." by Andrew Peterson. (If you want to click on the link, don't forget to mute our music on the right side just below the photos of the dogs.)

I love the lyrics to the song so much. Here's a portion of the song:

"And we're dancing in the minefields

We're sailing in the storms

This is harder than we dreamed

But I believe that's what the promise is for

So when I lose my way, find me

When I loose love's chains, bind me

At the end of all my faith, till the end of all my days

When I forget my name, remind me.

'Cause we bear the light of the Son of Man,

So there's nothing left to fear

So I'll walk with you in the shadowlands

Till the shadows disappear."

After 27 years of marriage, The song's words ring so true. So I danced with my baby and reminded her to hold on tight to Aaron, no matter what. And, of course, the key to doing so is to cling to Jesus who holds us on our trek through the minefields.

To God Be the Glory!